Saturday, October 08, 2005

More than Enough

"All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your live
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
worth living for
And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You're my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
You're my coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than I can see
You are more than enough for me"

'Enough' by Chris Tomlin/Louis Giglio

Is this true? Is God really more than you need. It should be, but is it? How does this play out in real life? Who is it you cry out to in your need, who is it that you desire, or what is it?
How can you sing this and mean it?

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Rainbow Trust

I said I would, and I keep forgetting! So here's a post on the Rainbow Trust.

A couple of weeks ago we had a charity fundraising event for the Rainbow Trust in honour of my cousin Sarah.

It was a fun evening - we had games, drinks, socialising and stuff to begin with - where my sister and I tried to win the good gifts on the tombola (although I went to have a go again later when I thought all the ones I didn't want might have gone - and everything had gone!). Rachel ended up with the cool rainbow vase which she managed to get by swapping with lots of people!

Next was the food, followed by some cool acts - singing, small band etc and then an auction. People were so generous and there was a wide variety of auction items ranging from tickets to see James Blunt to a handy man's service for the day!

There were loads of people there and it was nice to see family. My parents stayed with my friend George and Rach stayed with me and came to church in the morning - I think they liked it!

I will investigate how much was raised and update this post...

Also - I don't seem to be able to get the website to work - so I will give you a link when it does! Basically Rainbow Trust is a children's charity raising money for children with terminally ill diseases etc.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

The Oath

I've just finished reading a book called 'The Oath' by Frank Peretti.
I picked it up in a charity shop last year for no reason other than to find some books to read that weren't counselling textbooks!

From the outside it looks like a kind of scary evil kind of book, so I've kind of put off reading it. Until this week that is. Since I've picked it up I've barely been able to put it down! It had quite a slow start and it's a really fat book, so half the time I was wondering what the author was going to do to fill all the pages!

As it went on though, I discovered that it had a really strong Christian message. Whether the author is a Christian or not I do not know, but it screamed out some themes so loudly.

It's about a town that has a secret. The secret is protected by the people of the town, so much so that they'll kill to keep it that way. They especially don't like outsiders. People live in fear, and if they go against the rules then they get sucked in by the 'dragon'. A sore appears above their heart and it turns black. At first it hurts and burns, but as it gets worse and black stuff oozes out the pain goes away and the victim no longer cares. The victim goes wild, boasting about all the bad stuff they've got away with, they don't listen to reason and eventually they wander off and disappear never to be seen again.

The story starts with an outsider being killed. Half of their body is left and it looks like a bear attack. This is the first time that there's been a trace of anyone. The wife of the victim is traumatised and doesn't remember what happened. She is unharmed. (It later becomes clear that she is unharmed because she has Jesus inside her). Her brother-in-law Steve sets out on the task of what happened - not believing in the bear theory. With the help of a sheriff deputy he uncovers all sorts of things. He is majorly hindered by the townsfolk who do not want their dragon uncovered. Anyone who helps him is beaten up and eventually gets the black mark and then disappears.

The only person talking sense in the crazy Christian guy proclaiming that the dragon and black mark is sin, and that unless you accept Jesus into your heart you will die. The town started after a massacre of believers and a new charter was drawn up ending 'If this is sin, let sin be served' - all who signed it were sworn to secrecy. At the start, sin and the dragon were small and ignorable, but it's grown. Not believing this Steve ignores the crazy Christian until he sleeps with the married sheriff deputy and he too gains a mark above his heart. His brother too slept with someone he shouldn't have from the town. It appears that as you sin, the mark appears and gets bigger.

The head of the town believes that the dragon is on his side, even when he too gains a mark. He fights for control the whole way through and eventually it is his death.

About 5 people are eaten by the dragon as the story goes on. The dragon is almost invisible, but it's there and almost impenetrable. As the story comes to an end, the crazy Christian is killed and Steve runs for his life. In his absence, the town leader orders all the Christians to be evacuated and their homes plundered. As the townsfolks' black marks get bigger and start oozing they stop caring. They steal and set fire to things, there are riots and everything turns into chaos.

As Steve climbs to the dragons lair he discovers that in praying to God and asking for help, things start to go right. Twice he manages to blow up the dragon eventually damaging him almost fatally. Steve goes to shoot the dragon, but as he gets closer he falls in love with it. Maybe it can be tamed, maybe they can come to an agreement, he so lovely, so amazing, so tempting, he can't kill it, that would be wrong. Only when Steve is almost killed do his sense come back and he realises that since he's link to the dragon by the mark, he's being pulled in, tricked into a false sense of security. He runs for his life.

By this time, the town is a scary place to be. Steve makes it back, dragon follows, more people die and eventually Steve leads the dragon to an empty mine. Here he sets up a trap planned by the crazy Christian guy whereupon the dragon will hopefully impale himself and eventually die. Steve is followed by the townsfolk and they're in the way. Steve remembers that the dragon was afraid of the crazy Christian because he'd got Jesus. Steve tells the dragon to back up (which will impale him) and get away. Three times the dragon breathes fire at Steve throwing him about, but miraculously he is unharmed. He declares Jesus' name and asks him into his heart and eventually the dragon moves back. Steve has won - or rather God has won.

Finally, when you think the dragon is dead he grabs the cocky head of the town and eats him. At this point there is a flash of light and the dragon disappears. Sin has been conquered.





Does this story seem similar to anyone? ;)

Monday, October 03, 2005

Yoga

I've just been to my first Yoga class and I am soooooooo unflexible!

My housemate could do loads more than me. I think it will be good for us though. It was encouraging to feel your body being stretched and toned :)

The lady said outright that she doesn't believe in or do any of the 'spiritual' parts of yoga, just does it as exercise, so that's cool.

Think I might have to practice a bit so I don't wobble, shake and fall over again!

Sunday, October 02, 2005

No we won't let the rocks cry out!


"If we sit on them long enough do you think they'll stop crying out?"

"Nah I think we've gotta praise louder!"

"No we won't let the rocks cry out!"

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Christianness in lectures

Interesting debate we had today. (I may not have quite expressed it as I want to here)

It was in a lecture on Difference and Helping. We were doing an exercise involving some pairs of statements, like 'Mental health is socially affected' and 'Mental health involves a chemical inbalance' and we had to stand along a line at the point we agreed with the statements (with one at each end. It was all very informative - and we then had to discuss how our view would effect us as a counsellor.

One pair of statements chosen by two girls in the class was 'There is a God' and 'There isn't a God'. Most of the people at the 'There is a God' side were various forms of Christians and the like and people of other faiths. Most of the people went to the other side.

When we then discussed how it would effect us as counsellors the 'No God' side immediately attacked the 'God' side saying that they wouldn't be able to counsel people without bringing their God into it, that they'd force their faith on to people. Whereas they as the 'No God' side wouldn't do that and therefore it's better to not believe in God if you're a counsellor.

Now isn't that interesting. The people claiming to be non-judgemental and open to anything, were immediately attacking the God believing people and being judgemental towards them. I certainly wouldn't have liked any of them counselling me!

Someone in the middle made the best point though, saying that it's up to all of us to focus on the client and not ourselves. It doesn't matter what view of life you have if you're a trained professional - you should be able to be open and helpful whatever your client brings.

It's made me want to investigate other religions a bit - just so I can have an idea of where people are coming from.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Christianness on campus

I'm am laughing at God today. Or rather he's perhaps saying to me 'See!!'

I went to a campus unity talk at Soul Survivor thinking it would be about how to juggle CU and church. It wasn't, it was about juggling different Christian groups on campus. I then promptly switched off thinking, well there's only one group on my campus and there's only 6000 of us anyway.

Today at Freshers Fair I discovered a new group. Student Christian Movement www.movement.org.uk
I thought, ok cool that's interesting. They advertise themselves as being more liberal and welcoming of all people unlike the CU. I asked if they were working against the CU and they said no. But them seem to be doing the same things.

I have to admit that the thought to start an alternative Christian group had crossed my mind as I found the CU too cliquey, strict and unwelcoming. But I didn't like the idea of the Christians being divided on campus, so I was planning to start a SPEAK group working alongside CU rather than in competition with. It has now become clear that the CU leaders knew nothing about this new group until the Freshers Fair today, so it's all going to be very interesting I think.

New Church

Tried out a new church on Sunday. Well a different one, not a new new one! Although I've heard rumours of a Vineyard church being planted in York - I'll keep me eyes open.

Anyway. Went with my friend Bek - short cycle ride, so not too far. We were a bit late and it looked a little shut up, but we sneaked in to what appeared to be a fairly old building that's been recently done up giving a large and airy feeling that's not so big you get lost in it! As we walked down to find a seat that small band was playing 'Your love is amazing' and there were no pews (not that that's necessarily important!)

It was a family service, so not a typical service. It was very interactive though - especially since it seemed to be a one man show. He did well at getting the children involved (distinct lack of youth). I enjoyed the service. There must have been 30-40 people of various ages. The two ladies in front of us turned round at the end and complimented our singing! lol.

We chatted to a number of people afterwards and had a long chat with the vicars wife explaining that we'd come across the church quite by accident as it was not advertised anywhere. They're going to sort that out! Through chatting to her and an email I received from the vicar previously (a very nice and helpful email) we discovered that they are part of three churches in the area, they do Alpha, are linked to New Wine, have cell groups using the four Ws (welcome, worship, witness, word), and seem to have a very balanced and good theology/doctrine (whatever the right word is!!). They do a tiny bit of community work and mission, but are up for supporting any suggestions. They don't have any students.

We also went to the evening service which starts with coffee at 7pm, before the service at 7.30. All three churches come together for this, so there were a few people who were slightly younger, but still no youth or students. The service is usually worship and word and looks like it could be pretty good - but they were doing a presentation on their experiences at New Wine (which really could have been adequately done in 10mins rather than boring us all!) so it wasn't great.

We are going to try it out again this Sunday - they're having a welcome back to church week - so that'll be interesting!

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Sandcastle

Here is a sandcastle build by Keith and I on the beach at Lowerstoft a week ago :D







I hope you all approve ;)

Friday, September 16, 2005

UshopUgive

Guys!

You all need to go here http://www.ushopugive.com and register - for everyone that registers and nominates Norwich Youth for Christ - NYFC gets 50p, then when you buy anything through the website they get money too! You've got less than a week to do it though!

NYFC are a charity that does loads of great stuff and they only get money from donations and trusts - so they need all the help they can get!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Uni

Well it's that time again.

Travelled up today, thanks to the wonderful parents.

Had to get here in time for training for me new job - so I feel like it's been a really nonstop day.

So far I can't get onto my bed because there's too much stuff to sort out! The internet and router are working very well though and my phone is all set up and I've got my music playing and the TV almost works (gotta fiddle with the ariel a bit more), housemates seem ok.

Sunday

Lots of bits and pieces from Sunday, it's taken me till now to be able to post properly! How great to be back at uni with my broadband - although entertainingly we're getting broadband at home now I've left!

James spoke at church Sunday morning. We're in the hall now as they've taken the pews out of the main church. I prefer it in the hall (apart from have the muscians in the middle, but that's completely another story!). Aparently Norwich is the top Godless city in the UK! We gotta do something guys.

He also mentioned something about how all the reports in the press about Christians in the UK dying out by 2040 are actually just about the Anglican church and that it's not the same across the board. He also said something about Baptists being the fasted growing because they stick to the Bible the most. Obviously this won't be completely the same in every church, but generally speaking. I found it interesting, and also reassuring that maybe we won't have died out by 2040 - I'm certainly intending to still be a Christian then - I'll be 55 I think! lol

This all led nicely into the evening service where Randall came and talked to us about the work of NYFC - he was great. He also did a good plug for Reality (www.reality-norwich.com) - it's so exciting - I can't wait for next summer. I love Norwich. It's awful that it's the most Godless city. Us as Christians need kicking up our backsides to sort it out!

Paul C preached at the evening service. I like listening to him, but I prefer his Fridays talking - more interactive. The bits I picked out of his talk (before I read his notes!) were about expecting God in the unexpected places. He talked on Daniel 2 where Daniel had to interpret King Nebuchadnezzar's dream without knowing what it was about. Sometimes our non-Christian friends may have God talking to them without realising it and it's up to us to show them and explain to them. How we don't just go to people with God in a bag and offer some, we need to look at see where God is already working. Also that would shouldn't always expect to find God in all the usual places - he could be anywhere! It's also a little risking cuz you don't always know what God's doing - but you've got to trust.

There are more bits, but those are what stood out to me. They've encouraged me to keep going with my housemates. That at the vision of them getting Baptised!

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Banking

Today I am quite entertained with my banking.

I've been juggling the money in three of my accounts round to accommodate the large sum of rent I was expecting to go out today, only to come online and discover that it's not going out till Monday. How foolish of me to assume that a standing order a nice young man in the bank set up for me to go out of my account into my landlords on the 1st of each month wouldn't work like that! Oh no, after ringing my bank - who I have to say were very helpful but had ghastly music playing too loud when you're on hold - I discovered that this gentleman had set my standing order to be the first Monday of every month - huh?!! Ya what? Why?

On a more positive note I have discovered that shoving my overdraft (which is interest free) into my ISA has gained me almost a tenner in interest this month :) whoopee! I think that makes a grand total of about £50 if not more I've earnt on it this year. That should pay for a return train trip from York to Norwich anyway.

One thing I've yet to get my head round - although all may become clear one day, is why Amazon have take £10 less out of my account than I spent the other day? I thought I had an amazing deal anyway! I bought a netgear wireless router recommended by Tesco (since our internet account is with them) which they advertised as £100 for about £66 on Amazon with a free USB wireless adapter for £30! Bargin. Obviously delivery is free, but why have they taken £10 less out of my account?!

Actually, just looked on the email they sent me of my order and it appears that they've charged me the amount before tax. So does that mean they're gonna take the tax off me later?! Or what? Why haven't they done it together? Confused now.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

George and Adam's wedding

woooooooooooooooooooooowww!!






George looked absolutely gooorgeous. She was a shining white angel princess.

The wedding was cool - a mix of Jewish and Christian traditions - and we had fish and chips for the meal - awesome and random! I think I'd do that - much better than some posh meal.

It was well cool to see my friend Bek too - don't think we've seen each other for 3 months.

Train journey home today wasn't so great. For a start I'm not particularly well. I thought we were going to be late to the station but it was fine. Then discovered me train was 20 mins late so got permission to change to an earlier one. Then made a big mistake and took the slow local train from Reading to London which took an hour rather than 30mins - that left me 25 mins to get from paddington to liverpool street. Tube didn't come for 7mins and then kepts stopping in the tunnel. I resigned myself to thinking that I wouldn't get it, but arrived 2mins before my train, couldn't see it on the board, went to information, ran and found it, caught it and walked along it praising the Lord under my breath. All was great until we almost got to Chelmsford. There was a broken down train so we sat for over an hour not moving. By this point I felt really ill and wanted a hug from my mummy who's in Spain, so I rang Helsalata and cried down the phone to her and she was lovely! In the end we were only an hour and 15mins late and nana was wonderful and took me home with a picnic :)

Soul Survivor week B

Now this was no where near as good as Momentum but it was still cool. We were tired by this point too.

On a negative note - all the talks were the same as the previous week, which was extremely disappointing. The worship was more varied generally speaking, but the young people had an annoying habit of clapping after every single song which drove us completely nuts. Mike P tried to encourage people to have a break from clapping a number of times. They did a lot of whooping too!

Another thing that wasn't so great to start with was that they boys left us and we joined a group from Oak Grove who I barely knew - so it was a bit lonely.

It was hard starting back at the beginning again. I almost wish I hadn't stayed especially as the weather was so much worse. But I didn't want to go home after Momentum, and I was ready for it after SSB!

God still did stuff, I went to the chat room and got prayed for, Lou and I had great fun making up our own actions, Emily Singleton, who is now Emily Strange joined us for a day :D I bumped into my friend Anna and there were puddles through the carpet in the big tent!

There were some lovely new songs:
Now is the Time by Delirious? and Matt Redman which I really like.
Be my everything - Tim Hughes

can't remember any more at the mo. There was one by the dave crowder band which I think might not have been new, but was new to me. If I remember any more I'll post them!

OOoo forgot to mention in the momentum post - Soul Action www.soulaction.org well worth getting involved in. I'd love to go to Durban next year and in 2009 so I'll have to save up. Hopefully they'll be of some help for Reality www.reality-norwich.com as well.

Will post photo's when I go back to york and have broadband!

Momentum

I've decided to write about each of the last few weeks in separate bits so that my brain doesn't get too carried away!

Anyway - Momentum was awesome. It's a stream of Soul Survivor (www.soulsurvivor.com/uk) for school leavers/20s and 30s. I went with Fliss, Lou, Matt, Dom and of course Keith! ;) Except they all went to Passion for your Name - the worship leaders conference - freaks! So yeah, me the loner wandered into Momentum the first night - late - cuz I had miles further to go than the rest of them and walked up and down wondering who to squeeze in next to. Then I saw someone I knew! There was a girl from uni! I didn't know her much but she had come with a group of 30 from her home church - so I adopted them for the week - yey.

The talks were good. I especially liked J.John. Ali McInnes talked about the magi and shepherds worshipping Jesus in different ways on the first night and that was really helpful. I'll blog some more when I find my notes. I liked J.John's comment that if you're running away from God, the devil always provides transportation. (With reference to Jonah). He's so funny when he talks - unfortunately I can't do an impression on here! I didn't find many seminars helpful - mind you, you're mostly so tired after your brain being filled with so much information that there's no space for seminars! I was encouraged in a uni seminar on evangelism that they were with me on not being for the legalistic style of evangelism - ie knocking on peoples' doors, but were more for the relational of actually getting alongside people. I've since found out that my CU is stopping the door knocking :) Although it does have it's place. I was told a story about this guy going along a street giving out info, and at one house he felt and urge to keep on knocking even though no one was coming to the door. Then suddenly this big, threatening looking guy came to the door, grabbed the info and slammed the door shut. The next week this guy went up the same street doing some follow up work. He had barely knocked on the big guy's door when it swung up and he said, 'You gotta see this!' and dragged him inside. This evangelist was a little scared now as he was dragged up to the attic. The big guy said, 'look see that loop of rope hanging from the ceiling with the box underneath? Last week I was standing on the box with my head in the loop when you knocked on the door. I ignored you, but you were so persistant that I thought I'd go as a couple of minutes didn't matter. I read the leaflet you gave me, knelt down at my box and gave my life to Christ.' Awesome man!

Worship was cool. We had Delirious?, Jonny Parks, Martyn Lazell, 3 people from Soul Survivor Watford who led together and often had some drummers with them who used bins from B&Q! I felt so immensely free in my worship this year - more than at Passion last year. I danced and jumped about, I danced in the spirit (it was like swimming through liquid chocolate :D) and joined 6 people in a conga line around the tent - extremely exhilirating. We all held hands and jumped - that was great. It was just so awesome to be enjoying God's presence and partying with him. I even went to the front and told all 3000 of the people there how great it was and how I used to not be able to join in so fully. I wanted to encourage people.

That'll do for now, may fill in the gaps later - feel free to ask questions

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Walking

Went for a walk around Horsford with Keith today - was nice to be in the peace and quiet.
We stopped for a picnic in the village hall playground which was nice too. Brought back memories of Nana and Grandpa's 40th wedding anniversary celebration that we had there. I think it would have been their 50th wedding anniversary this weekend...

I've been quite tired today - haven't been able to keep my eyes open much. Frustrating - but hey!

Yesterday Keith and I had a competition to see who could buy the most in Anglia Square for a fiver. I won :) It had to be more than 10p and it had to be something we could use at Passion and Momentum next week. It was such a laugh!

I have dyed my hair again. It's just darker brown. I quite like it. Means I don't have blonde streaks any more! - yey!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Update

Well, I'm not feeling quite so sick. Drs taken me off the pill that I was on for my skin - downside is that my skin is starting to deteriorate slowly now :(

Only got about 4 hrs sleep last night due to a sore throat and don't feel much better now. I've also had intense headaches most days since I stopped me medication and I've had quite an emotional day - mostly due to tiredness and being on the edge of illness - d'oh!

On a more positive note - last day of work today :) so yey - all done for now! Now I can relax a bit.

I'm a bit apprehensive about going to Momentum next week. My mood swings have been quite excessive and I don't want it to spoil things for me. I want to have a good time and learn more about God and maybe break down some barriers.

Well looking forward to some chilled out days with Keith this week and our trip to the beach with the Tumas :)

Sunday, July 31, 2005

Sickness

Not supposed to be on really but just popped on to renew me overdue library books (£1 fine! rudeness!)

Anyway, I just wanted to blog some of my frustration.
Basically I feel sick. For as long as I can remember I've always felt sick when I'm hungry or tired, but at the moment I'm feeling sick most of the time and eating doesn't help. In fact it's now got to the point of preventing me from eating properly.

I'm also tired all the time. I just have no energy. Sometimes I can do stuff, sometimes I just completely flop and can't keep me eyes open.

It's just so frustrating - I want to do stuff but I can't.

Hopefully going to the drs this week, but in the meantime - prayer is much appreciated.

Friday, July 29, 2005

Soul in the City

Just some ponderings.

Almost this time a year ago we were in London, some of us in Hackney, working for the community as part of Soul in the City.

If this bombing stuff had happened last year, would we have still been there? Would we have still gone?

Are people we met ok? Have they been caught up in stuff?

Monday, July 25, 2005

Awesome

Went to Proclaimers evening service 'Awesome' last night.

Just gonna blog 5 good points and 5 bad points for now

Good:
  1. I liked the length of the songs and the way they did repeats. They didn't just sing the same song over and over again
  2. I liked the video style notices and info giving that they filmed and showed
  3. I was impressed by everyone's friendliness
  4. The Bible was used
  5. It was good to see lots of young people worshipping God

Not so good:

  1. I felt that they were a little full of themselves and talked about themselves and how wonderful they are too much
  2. I hate Hillsongs!
  3. The talk wasn't particuarly strong. Had some good points but was very bitty and I couldn't see where it was going and came away quite confused!
  4. It was a bit overwhelming - didn't quite know what we were supposed to do in going from the meeting area at the beginning into the main bit.
  5. Man they pressure people to respond - I'm torn as to whether that's good or bad - can be both I guess

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Mmm... chocolate!

Memories

Tonight I went to pick up my sister from her school trip to Yorkshire.

It brought back memories of the 3 similar trips on went on with school.

I was very surprised by the teachers reactions to me. One, whom I used to play practical jokes on, turned round and gave me the most massive hug exclaiming how great it was to see me. They all seemed so genuinely pleased to see me. I was kinda taken aback. I thought they'd have moved on and be too busy sorting out all the young people they'd just been away with, but no! They were interested in stopping, chatting, hugging and finding out how I was.

Maybe people do like me?! ;)

Monday, July 18, 2005

Meditation

Tonight I went to the Monday night meditation group at St Augustine's after comments from Heather's blog (sorry - haven't got time to figure out links!). I was very apprehensive in going since I didn't know anyone and wasn't really sure where I was going!

Anyway, there were about 10 people and they were all very welcoming - one intent on telling me she'd been to NCBC for 20 years. I restrained myself from telling her that it's only been 'alive' 2 years, and if we're including the churches beforehand then I've been there 20 years too! Lol - makes me laugh. She didn't recognise me, although I recognised her.

We moved on quite quickly to getting started after a brief introduction and listenined to a tape with some guy called John talking about faith. I can't remember much about that as I struggled to switch off the busy day I've had. A guy then quickly explained what we were gonna do and the role of the mantra. We then listened to a few minutes of music followed by 20/5 mins of silence and then a bit more music.

For the first 10 minutes I managed to keep saying the mantra (ma-ra-na-tha or something - supposedly meaning come God) and got quite into it. Although it felt very intense and I had an imense pressure on my chest and head. I thought that was me trying to concentrate but it wasn't. I felt that I need to give some things over to God, so I did, but then got really really hot and felt sick and light-headed so I had to pull back. For the rest of the quiet time I was just jiffily waiting for the time to end. I wanted to go home and put me head down!

It all felt very strange. I didn't slip into it as easily as the times I've done reflective stuff before like when Heather did stuff at Fridays or on conferences I've been to. Maybe with practice it'll become easier. I just like the way it has potential to bring focus when my head is so usually all over the place.

We also talked a bit about 24/7 which was cool as I was able to fill them in a bit. I felt quiet but confident with them which was nice. A little scared to go again, but I'd like to. I wonder if they'd mind me lying on the floor, or is it important to sit on a chair with a straight back and feet flat?

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Motorbike

I forgot to say last night

- I rode the back of my friend's motorbike!!!!

Monday, July 11, 2005

Results

Yey, have just checked on the college intranet and I've passed all my assignments this semester!
I even got an 80%! That's 10% over an A whoooo. Overall this semester I got A and 2 Bs so I am very pleased.

Looking more closely it was my practical demonstration of my skills that let me down - not surprised at all! Hmm.... gonna have to work on that one. My A was in 'Helping in the Social Context' - that included my placement. I know I'm a helper, so that's not surprising and is very cool.

Even better though is that my housemate only failed one assignment! I am so proud and pleased. She does so well even though it's all a major struggle for her (she's dyslexic and dyspraxic (sp?!)) and her tutors don't seem to give her much help. She needs to redo it by the end of Aug to carry on her course - so Lord please help her in that. Thankfully her computer and software to help her are arriving tomorrow. I'm just so pleased she's passed!!

Friday, July 08, 2005

24/7

Well that's the end of it then.

Well, maybe it's actually the start.

The room shut at 7pm this evening, it was sad shutting the door. There was no big celebratory ending, nothing jumping up and saying whoo. Don't know what I expected really. Was a bit of an anti-climax.

Still, it is majorly exciting the number of people that used it and the number of prayers said.

Hopefully we can set the ball rolling for a permanent room...

I'm sad that I am unable to make the clearing of the room session tomorrow and the celebration sat night. Ah well, can't be everywhere at once!

I just wanna praise the Lord for these 3 weeks and say 'long may the praying continue'

Networking

Well, in the next few days I'm going to be hopefully sorting out bills and stuff with housemates.
Gas and elec is fine - just gotta sort out how to pay.
Phone and internet is where the fun starts. We've got to agree on a provider - at the moment it could go anywhere.
Then there's the networking. In theory it's simple, may take a bit of setting up, but should be ok once we've got it going. The question is, which wireless/router/modem to we get, or do we get them separately or what?! I feel that my brain is a little too small for this and dad's only going to be with us until Sunday. Hmm.. oh ye of little faith. We will sort it!

Advice, suggestions, prayer welcomed! (infact advice/suggestions are better by text or email (yahoo) since I'm leaving tomorrow morning!)

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Money

I'm sure I've blogged about this before - but how is one sensible with money?

I've just done some calculations. I've earnt about £900 by working full-time for the last 5 weeks or so. That leaves me with £150 after I've paid my rent for the next 3 months until my next loan installment. That will be about £1000 which will leave me with £250 when I get to Christmas.

I am currently in negative on my bank balance, so if I put that money in to my overdraft that still leaves me in over £300 debt, since once rent was paid this term, there wasn't a great deal left of my loan. And that's just accommodation - then there's food and general living. Maybe I need to work some more. The thing is, not many places are up for employing you just for summer - especially when you try to fit too much into it!

This isn't a plea for money, just comments on how you can be expected to go to uni without getting in debt. I just don't understand how you can live without working all summer and working during term time. I know all the arguments for 'you go to uni knowing you're gonna get in debt' and 'you can't expect money to be handed to you on a plate' but I am sensible with money. Far too sensible sometimes and yet I'm still gonna be in at least £9000 debt at the end of uni and that's just the student loan - which I have to say - doesn't go much further than accommodation and bills.

Hopefully I've got a job for September (depending on whether a girl passes her a levels) which will help a great deal. I thought I was doing fine, but then there's this big summer gap with no loan. If I'm struggling, how on earth do my housemates manage? I think one is already in up to £10000 debt.

I also don't understand how people like Keith can slog their guts out, but then when their pay comes in it only just about covers rent and bills. How do people afford things? Is it all just credit cards, store cards and massive amounts of debt?

This is quite a rant really isn't it? I'll shut up now.

Thank you Lord for all that you have given me. Thank you for wonderful friends and family. Thank you for the roof over my head, the food on my plate and my general safety and aliveness.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Hair update

Just got back from an all nighter at Open - well knackered!

Anyways, discovered on Paul's blog that you can upload photos direct, so here are some long awaited photos of my hair for those who haven't/can't see it.

This is the initial stages with kitchen foil:


Then we have straight after the foil is taken off:












After I've washed it:

When it's dry:










It's a shame it's starting to go more orangy now... maybe it will tone in with my hair. Grrr...

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Matches

Whoo - just doing half days tomorrow and Thursday - I can't wait.
Am going in to the NYFC office to help Fliss do the bulletin. It shall be fun.

Spoke to a friend in from York this evening and she's going to come to Soul Survivor with us - another yey :) Means we can go on to our friend George's wedding straight on after it.

Prayed in the 24/7 prayer room today after work. That was cool. It's so lovely and chilled. I love having this space. It gives me more motivation to spend time with God. I'm coming away from everything in the day - there's nothing in the room from the day to distract me (other than my own mind). It's so much easier than just my room. Although I did struggle not to fall asleep today.

I was so excited this morning because I felt different. I felt awake. I stayed up a little too late, but I didn't fall asleep on Keith when we were watching dodgeball like I have been doing after work. I got up early and felt wide awake. This carried on all day until about 2 and then it just went. I found it incredibly hard to keep my eyes open. I needed match sticks or something. It's frustrating. I don't like being so tired. I get plenty of sleep.

I have just made some chocolate biscuits - the smell is wafting through the house - mmmm

Have also almost finished all the Fridays cards. Mark picked a load up this evening, I may see if I can carry the rest to work tomorrow ready to do in the bulletins! It's been quite fun and quite random changing the fives to sixes and the twos to nines. He he - well it's kept my family entertained.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Eeek

My hair is now dyed :) I'm worried it's gonna fade though. I'm gonna have to keep dying my hair brown until it grows out if that's the case! What have I started! Thanks to Keith and Rach for doing it though.

We had a sort of cell group after work today - Laura, Lou, Carl and I. We went to the cathedral for evensong first. I found it quite amusing. Laura refuses to go with me again. D'oh! Ah, maybe I'll be able to take it more seriously next time. We had a bit of a chat and an initially discussed maybe what we'd like to do. Feels good to have something happening.

I want to go on holiday, but I don't know what to do. Suggestions? (sensibly!)

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Hair

I'm going to dye my hair this evening :D

If you're lucky I may post pics :D

Did the quiz from Carl's blog too. I don't think I feel alienated from older forms of church though. Possibly can't relate to them, but alienate is too big a word. Also, I don't think learning takes place in just dialogue. Is there anywhere you can read what it says about the other ones?

You scored as Emergent/Postmodern. You are Emergent/Postmodern in your theology. You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well. No one knows the whole truth about God, and we have much to learn from each other, and so learning takes place in dialogue. Evangelism should take place in relationships rather than through crusades and altar-calls. People are interested in spirituality and want to ask questions, so the church should help them to do this.

Emergent/Postmodern

75%

Charismatic/Pentecostal

64%

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan

64%

Classical Liberal

54%

Fundamentalist

50%

Neo orthodox

43%

Modern Liberal

43%

Reformed Evangelical

36%

Roman Catholic

21%

What's your theological worldview?
created with QuizFarm.com

Monday, June 06, 2005

Lots to blog on

I have lots of different things to blog on today after reading different peoples' blogs and stuff.

I've not been working four days at the Valuation Office at St Andrew's Business Park. I have to say that I'm quite enjoying it. Not the getting up at 6.30 and having to travel across the city, but the days go pretty quick and the work is quite varied. Last year I worked in the same business park in St Andrew's hospital or whatever it is - stuffing envelopes in a room alone - very boring! Everyone in the office is really friendly though and we have a laugh.

Babysat for Grace with Keith last night. That was fun just to chill as we were both knackered. Shame she didn't wake up though - we need to day sit her, then we can teach her cheeky habits ;) Was nice to chat with Mark and Naomi when they got back too - all chilled and lovely.

I've been talking to so many people who are struggling with churches at the moment and not knowing where they belong. It's so frustrating. I feel like I'm loosing all this valuable time. For a start it would be lovely to pray with people regularly. It would be lovely to have people challenge me on my faith and walk with God - it would be lovely to be able to do the same for others. It would be lovely to belong to a church where I could express God's love be being a part of and doing things in the community. It would be lovely to be supported in my struggles with my housemates. Even at home it's not better. I love NCBC and if I was here permanently I think I could really get involved and do stuff - but I don't know how to if I'm just here for the summer. I was talking to Lou today about being frustrated about living in York. I so want to be more involved in NYFC too - helping with and planning for Fridays and everything else. I'll just have to be patient. I know that York is where God wants me now. But I don't see how my Christian side is fitting in.

I was interested to read Heather's blog on meditation. I'd really like to do some of that. I bought a book recommended by Carl off ebay called 'spiritual discipline' - problem being I don't have the time/energy/discipline to really get into it. Hmm... dunno what to do.


I'm also frustrated a little cuz with working full time it means I can't help out with the 24/7 prayer as much as I'd like to. Can't do everything I guess - will just have to do as much as I can. Same goes to helping Fliss with the bulletin. I'm really starting to appreciate the struggles 'normal' people have with trying to fit everything in and priorities. Lou seems to think I'm entitled to some time off if I work over a month. Seems rude to ask though...

Need to stop being tired

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

World View Quiz

Yep, I've done em too.

Interestingly I didn't fully understand a number of the words in this one so it may have altered my score - also I'm amused that it's called me a cultural creative as well - is this a new thing they're trying to get us all to be?

You scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Cultural Creative

69%

Idealist

56%

Fundamentalist

56%

Existentialist

44%

Postmodernist

38%

Romanticist

38%

Modernist

25%

Materialist

13%

What is Your World View? (updated)
created with QuizFarm.com

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Moving

There's so much to consider when moving from uni accommodation to a house.

Like, which power supply to use: they currently use npower, but I've been told that's one of the most expensive in the Yorkshire area - so no which one? And how easy is it to change?

Internet connection: all the internet deals look great, but when there are 4 heavy users, you've got to have unlimited downloads which immediately wacks the price up.

Then what about the phone? You gotta have a phoneline for broadband, but my housemates claim they won't use it, so I can't get a deal on it. But they soooo will use it.

Then there's rooms. Who gets which one?

ARGH

Monday, May 23, 2005

Dedication

Went to The Rock again on Sunday. Don't think I'll go again. It's just not right.

The one thing I was impressed with this week though was the way in which they did a dedication for a new baby. (A very gorgeous one!) This baby doesn't have a dad that's going to be about for it. The leader didn't go into detail about it, but he did emphasise about it not being God's plan for it to be this way and how it's very sad that it's got to be this way. He then went on to proclaim how much God still loves this mother and her new daughter. I found it very beautiful and moving - it brought a tear to me eye! It impressed me because he did it so sensitively, he didn't avoid the issue, but he didn't make a big deal of it and he made sure that the mother and daughter, and the congregation knew that God still loves them.

That was the only good bit. The worship was loud and performancy and pushy as usual. The leader babbled on and on about maturity - some of which was good, some was just 'huh?!'

Back to King's when I'm next in York me thinks.

NCBC this week :D

Monday, May 16, 2005

Aren't We Great?!

Humility. Any interesting concept and one that could be missing from the church I went to yesterday.

Went to The Rock again (the 'We're the best church' one). I have to say that I did like it better this time compared to the last time. I went with my mum, Dionne and Bek. We had a free drink beforehand (got vouchers) and a few people came and chatted to us. I did enjoy the worship this time. Although I still disagree with it, I wasn't distracted by the guys running around with video cameras making the band appear on the screen behind the words. Didn't know many of the songs, but I really appreciated the way that they all flowed into each other without breaks - stops me getting distracted. Another plus point for me was that we sang Mary Mary's 'Shackles'. Never sang it in church before, but it meant so much to me at Passion last year so it was cool. Still don't like the 6 singers at the front though. They're too tarted up. Wrong impression in my mind. Also struggled with the whole are we clapping the band or God?

Didn't get to do communion, it's kind of an option self service thing at the front - no one in our pew went. It's not explained very well what it is. The talk was very very good. Although about listening to God and doing as he says and being amazed and rewarded and stuff. The leader spoke from personal experience. They had four people going off to do mission that they prayed for at the front which was cool. Think they prophesied too - no headscarves! Although they weren't women - actually I don't know what this church thinks on women. It used to be Assemblies of God.

I think they're more community orientated that I thought. Missed the good old anglican style of praying for the church and local community and then Uk and then the wider world. We didn't really pray or confess actually... There was a lot about breaking through boundaries in worship and stuff. Didn't like the 'everyone raise your hands bit' - I'll do that if I want thanks, not cuz you say so.

Will take Keith next time he comes to see what he thinks! ;)

Why is finding a church so hard? Really need to talk to God more.

Friday, May 13, 2005

*Grin*

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Thursday, May 12, 2005

Money

Money

Money sucks big time.

Why can't we have no money and just have what we need or something?!

My housemate has £30 for the next 2 weeks. She can't live on that. When she gets paid in two weeks most of that will go out on bills. When she gets paid a month after that most of it will go on our rent. She has no other money - she's maxed out.

I don't know what to do other than pray. She's wasted so much of it but she doesn't learn. She spends for comfort and I don't know how to make her see that she's wonderful.

Help?

And while you're at it God, Keith could do with a few hundred for his car poor guy, if not we may not be able to see each other. Why is it that even when you're sensible with money, it still attacks you? Why does money have to control so much?

Why?

I could do with a job too to help me through the summer gap.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Train Tickets

I just managed to catch my train back to York yesterday at 8.57am. Silly to pick at train during rush hour really!

Anyway, I hadn't bought a ticket and Norwich station doesn't have any ticket machines so you just have to queue and hope that you get to the front before your train leaves. I got there with about 5mins to spare so I ran to the front (there were about 15 people) telling everyone that my train was about to go. I discovered that at least the 4 front people had the same problem so I let them go first.

It was a very un-Helen thing to do. I'm never usuallly that assertive and forceful. I even heard someone exclaim 'How rude!' but I stuck to it otherwise I would have missed my train. It took me most of the train journey to recover and persuade myself that other angry customers weren't gonna come and have a go at me!

Did I do the right thing?

Saturday, May 07, 2005

Guess what?!!!

I'm a bit late with this, but haven't been able to get online properly til now!!

I'm going out with a wonderful guy called Keith!!!!

Just thought I'd let the world know ;)

He's so lovely and caring, and thoughtful blah blah blah - ok I'll stop now before I and he gets too embarrassed.

Oh and - can you please pray for him as he's probably gonna be attacked by my family (up to 10 of em) on Sunday afternoon - he he!!!

Church again

Just a quite update from church last week. (Internet hasn't been on properly for a week!!!)

When I asked a woman about the headscarf stuff at the church on sunday she mumbled something about the apostle guy who heads up all their types of churches believes they should do it, so they do. I asked her what would happen if they had no headscarves and stuff and a woman wanted to pray, she said 'oh we're not that leagalistic!'

I will try and speak to the vicar next time.

I also discovered that the church is in a bit of a limbo state at the moment, which might explain some of the reasons I'm finding it hard to know whether to stick with it at the moment. The vicar is commuting from Swansea every weekend!!!!! He's been vicar since Jan and it struggling to find a house. So maybe things will be different once that's sorted.

Friday, April 29, 2005

29p Easter eggs

I've lost count of home many we've had as a house now.

Buttons eggs, creme egg eggs all for 29p each!

How are we gonna cope now they've sold out?!!!

Sad really isn't it?

Today has been very unproductive. I need to finish one essay and make a good start on the next. Maybe this evening something will happen. The sun is sooo nice though. Have been to sainsburys - that was productive. Oh and have tidied bedroom a bit and cleared out freezer a bit and epilated me legs :D

Saw The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy last night. I enjoyed it. It was very funny - especially the theme music - 'Thanks for all the fish!'

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Student Volunteering Officer

So God, you want me to do this?

I had a phonecall from the President of the student union this evening asking me if I'd like to be Student Volunteering Officer. Apparently my name came up at a meeting and he was asked to 'encourage me'. Nomination deadline is Thurs 12pm so I've got to decide by then and come up with a manifesto. Hmm.... I don't even do any volunteering in York!

I don't really know what it involves. I'm meeting up with him tomorrow lunchtime. I just asked my housemates but they're weren't interested. They're a bit distracted by the fact that Sarah managed to set the grill on fire today. ;)

I don't know what to do. It's sounds like a cool title and would look good on my CV, but I don't think I could do it. It means talking to people and arranging and organising things!

Am I just suffering from a lack of confidence in myself?

Do I have time for it?

blah blah blah

Not such a good day today.

Think I'm just tired. It was a long day yesterday.

Experiential was very quiet. Usually we talk quite a bit, but today we were pretty silent. Think it could be because we're drawing to a close of the year.

I was awful in skills group. I was being observed by the tutor and videod today as counsellor. I just didn't know what I was doing and we had two very long uncomfortable pauses. I just feel really inadequate today. I was trying to make sure I worked through the model we're studying (so that I can write my essay) but at the same time you're not supposed to have a hidden agenda and are supposed to just go with the client. It's impossible to do both! Think maybe it could be coming from the feeling of helplessness from work yesterday. I feel like I don't know what I'm doing! I need a robot to practice counselling on.

In fact I'd love my course if we didn't have to do the practical videoed bit of actually counselling! lol

*sigh*

Can I do it?

First day at work yesterday.

Man that was an experience. I can't really go into much detail due to not really being clear on the confidentiality side of things! It was care work for disabled adults, in this flat two guys. One needing 2 to 1 support and the other 1 to 1. It was hands on the whole time. Neither of them could talk and a lot of my time was spent just keeping an eye on them. They both have challenging behaviour (yey, 64p extra an hour) and act like children.

We had music group in the afternoon - great fun! Not so fun on the car journey sitting between them though! One liked to hit. They're both really lovely though and you just fall in love with them.

The work will involve personal care as they can't do anything for themselves. I feel like I needed to be older and more worldly wise before I can do the job though. I need to have had kids! Cuz that's what it's like.

I'd like to be able to do it. It'll be good for me. I'm just not sure if it's for me. There's so much to remember and to do. Maybe it gets easier. It takes me an hour to get there too on the bus. I'm going to try biking tomorrow (gotta be there for 7.30am) and see how that goes! Working on Monday too - time and a half yey. Maybe I can stick it out until at least the summer!

I don't think I can be authoritative enough.

Hmmm... all confused

Headscarves

So what's the deal?

Why are the ladies at King's wearing headscarves when they are prophesying (don't you just get so confused on how you're supposed to spell that?!!)? Is it Biblical and ought we all be doing it?

The discussion on the forum hasn't helped much yet http://www.norwichyfc.co.uk/YaBBSE/index.php?topic=7607.0

But a couple of verses have been mentioned:
1 Corinthians 11:11-16
In the Lord, however, woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of women. For as woman came from man, so also is man born of woman. But everything comes from God. Judge for yourselves: Is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered? Does not the very nature of things teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a disgrace to him, but if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For long hair is given to her as a covering If anyone wants to be contentious about this, we have no other practise - nor do the churches of God.

Help please?

Friday, April 22, 2005

Who Should you vote for?

Yes I've jumped on the bandwagon too. My results I posted on Laura's blog are wrong cuz I didn't realise some were negative. Anyway, this is pretty much the same as what I got the first time:


Who Should You Vote For?

Who should I vote for?

Your expected outcome:

Liberal Democrat


Your actual outcome:



Labour 16
Conservative -25
Liberal Democrat 42
UK Independence Party -5
Green 43


You should vote: Green

The Green Party, which is of course strong on environmental issues, takes a strong position on welfare issues, but was firmly against the war in Iraq. Other key concerns are cannabis, where the party takes a liberal line, and foxhunting, which unsurprisingly the Greens are firmly against.

Take the test at Who Should You Vote For

Monday, April 18, 2005

King's

Well, thought I'd better post about church yesterday ;)

My friend Bek and I went to a new church on recommendation from my next-door-neighbour. It's a Ministries Without Borders church, of which I know nothing about - anyone that does, please feel free to comment!


We arrived 15mins late - by accident, and didn't quite know where to go as it's in a community hall. We were welcomed by a lady with a baby (who we later found out is the wife of the head elder) and then a young lad immediately grabbed us chairs without anyone asking. At this point, members of the church we taking it in turns at the front to share stuff with us - like the sharing time at Fridays, so that was pretty cool.

Next was some worship. Not brilliantly polished, but it felt real, sang some good songs - one made me cry cuz it reminded me of last year and it's an incredibly moving song anyway. There was some praying - the congregation joined in, there was space for people to pray and speak in tongues all together, there was a spontaneous song started which was cool.

The guy who spoke was really good to listen to. He interacted really well with the congregation, it wasn't just sitting there listening to him. He talked about the early church in Acts 2 and how we should follow it's example. Become Christians, be baptised, and receive the Holy Spirit. How we should have community together, be always praising the Lord, listening to teaching, share everything and do miracles. It was good stuff and interesting. Would like to learn more tho on their views of the Holy Spirit. He was suggesting you couldn't have him without being baptised - now I haven't be baptised but I sure have the Holy Spirit!

We finished with communion and a song - concerned on health and safety sharing the cup without washing it, holding the bread in our hands.... but hey!

People came and spoke to us afterwards without us even moving! Although the first girl isn't there really, used to be, has moved away, but keeps coming back! People were friendly and genuinely interested. They have cell groups, they're looking forward and looking to do more things in the community.

So, we shall go again next week and see what happens.

Friday, April 15, 2005

Compliments

Today in class we looked at feedback, particularly in the form of compliments.

We had to get into groups of 4, then go round and give each person a compliment that was superficial and then one that was deeper. It was hard work both from a giving and receiving point of view!

Here are what people said about me:
SUPERFICIAL
You are beautiful
We all like your infectious smile, you've got good teeth and appear friendly.
Nice eyes

DEEP
You're open
You're very real, genuine
Great sense of humour
Shining personalitly
So patient
Really caring
You're passionate
You are very organised.

I've written these down here as so often I find it difficult to remember my good points when put on the spot - so I can remind myself by looking on here!

As I received the compliments I felt myself get really hot and red. I tried to brush the compliments off by joking about my heating up etc and making a laugh out of it all (something I'm discovering I do quite a lot to hide what I really think/feel).

We then fed back to the group how it felt. We had all struggled with the exercise. We agreed that the British are quite reserved and don't always talk openly about this kind of stuff. We also agreed that we should compliment our friends and people more and point out their strengths (and possibly weaknesses too). Another interesting thing we discussed is whether when our friend are new, we see more of their qualities, then as we get to know them better we start to take these things for granted and don't see them so clearly unless we really think about it.

I also think that I just don't register in my brain people's good points and qualities. That doesn't mean I can't see them, I just don't very often think about them. Perhaps something I need to practice. I kind of just instinctively know whether I'd get on with someone and don't analyse it down to their individual qualities. It's nice to be able to compliment someone though.